I Love You. Ditto!

Hokay, let’s examine the evidence.

So, in the second trimester Gatekeeper announced her pregnancy to Mortimer Goth, the father. He didn’t take it well, and they broke up shortly afterword.

Mortimer, because he had slept with Gatekeeper (a four-star celebrity), was a celebrity himself. Susannah Lipscomb was our most active paparazzi at the time of Harley Quinn’s conception.

Harley Quinn, who was born a day after Mortimer and Gatekeeper’s breakup, spent three days as a sim baby, and then had her toddler birthday party. Susannah showed up to photograph said party in the third trimester of pregnancy.

MEANWHILE, she was grieving for a spouse/boyfriend who had died recently. Sims grieve for dead significant others for two days. Sim pregnancies last three.

Susannah then, on the night of Harley Quinn’s birthday, gave birth to a little blue baby named Jolene Lipscomb. The family-tree check was conclusive; Mortimer is the father, and Jolene is Harley Quinn’s half-sister.

MEANING:

In less than a sim-week, Mortimer Goth impregnated Gatekeeper, refused to take responsibility for the baby, and then missed the birth of his firstborn child because he was too busy misusing his celebrity and knocking up an emotionally compromised fan ON THAT SAME NIGHT. Yes, he moved on in less than twenty four hours by having an AFFAIR with a PROFESSIONAL STALKER whose husband was on his DEATHBED.

The final verdict?

Phoenix Wright: “MORTIMER GOTH IS AN ASSSSHOOOOOOOOOLE!!!”

And that’s leaving aside all the nonsense about running away when Gatekeeper came to visit, refusing the birthday invitation, and giving his ghost-genes to NOT Harley Quinn. Y’know, Bella gets a bad rap in the Sims fandom. Aliens and all. But once in awhile, let us all stop and remember that she is but one half of a perfect whole.

A perfect ass-whole.

*ba-dum-tish*

Luckily, we have Quincy.

“Yay, you’ve remembered my traits!”

Quincy Goth is an insane, virtuoso, ambitious, friendly and brave sim. There, now you know!

Also, you may have been thinking ‘Hey, that birthday party didn’t have any death in it at all! The curse is over!’ If so, you were thinking wrong.

Say hi to Leanne French, also known as Leslie’s kid. She died of old age in our pool, briefly learning to walk on water in the process. Just forgot to put that in the last chapter. It just wouldn’t be a Personality birthday without sobbing and heartbreak!

NOW….

Let’s try this again, shall we?

Quincy: “OK, you’ve broken me down. You know I can’t say no to you twice.”

Gatekeeper: “SWEET!”

Quincy: “I’m getting married today, so I’d like a tattoo to show my wife-to-be I love her?”

Tattooist: “Making two permanent decisions in one day? Seems legit.”

Quincy: “Wow, I’m going to be like, a walking work of art, huh?”

Tattooist: “More floating work of art, really.”

Quincy: “Wait, I thought I wanted this thing on my chest?”

Tattooist: “Yeah, and?”

Quincy: “I’m so confused.”

Quincy: “Oh right, I don’t have skin. I feel a bit silly now.”

It’s not visible in his ghost-form, but I actually got him a giant red heart right across his chest. It’s his secret hilarious tattoo, given for the sole purpose of making me chuckle whenever I remember that it’s there, secretly. And hilariously.

Wedding time. In the graveyard, because it just felt right somehow. Displaying an uncharacteristic amount of effort, I actually designed Gatekeeper a new outfit for the occasion.

I particularly like the back.

Gatekeeper: “Woah, your eyebrows just leapt off your face. This must be important.”

Quincy: “Heh.”

Serge holds in his tears like a man. Really obviously and with more difficulty than it’s worth.

Dixie: “…”

Aw, I love when the parents get front row seats, so to speak. They look like they’re holding hands!

Serge: “Can you believe our little girl iz actually married? ‘Ow ze time flies!”

Sheogorath: “Is that what just happened? I wondered why all these people were just standing around.”

Serge: “Mon amour, zat’s why we both got dressed up! For ze wedding!”

Sheogorath: “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I always dress like this. *sips the drink that tastes like DEFIANCE*”

I renovated the murder-shack again into a little private oasis for our newly-weds. Hey, waste not…

Gatekeeper: “So, ready to lose your virginity one hundred years overdue?”

Quincy: “Would you judge me if I said YES.”

(With that hair, I could make connections)

And a Quincy portrait is promptly added to the Personality canon; POINT.

Sheogorath: “That’s right! Money is the most important thing!”

Sheogorath: “Make sure to tell the world about it in your memoirs. Now, which little baby has earned a daiquiri?”

Stop trolling, Sheo.

Sheogorath: “Never!!”

Harley Quinn has been TSALing off-screen. Not much to say about her toddlerhood; she skills at a meh pace, which is disappointing considering her pedigree. Gatekeeper DEVOURED the TSAL, and isn’t Mortimer supposed to be some revolutionary scientific genius?

She learned everything she was supposed to anyway, just none of it was picture worthy.

Gatekeeper: “Heh. Looks like you’re going to be a big sister soon, Harley Quinn.”

Harley Quinn: “Dun’ care, bottah.”

I think I took this picture just to give you a wider view of the murder-shack. Adorable baby-bump and brave pregnant woman in a swimsuit is just a bonus.

Gatekeeper: “Think this one’s a ghost-baby, Quincy?”

Quincy: “Hmm, well I DO hear some chains rattling in there…”

Parents WANTING their child born dead? Only in The Sims, man.

Gatekeeper: “Doo de doo, off to have my second-born, doo de doo…”

Gatekeeper: “That was a lot easier the second time around.”

GEE I WONDER WHY.

It’s another girl, folks! Meaning we have sisters for the first time ever in this Legacy! Hurrah!

Ah, but what to call this little pink blob. Hmmmmmm….

Hmmm.

Hm.

Perfect!

 

(Current Score: 55)

(cookies for anyone who understands the chapter title XD)